I have been having trouble with my parents forever... I'm 20 %26amp; they financially support me as I am a full-time student, but are divorced.
My mom is bi-polar %26amp; she is consistently, inconsistent. Sometimes she is abusive verbally, and often I get broken promises.
My dad, is a bit of a right-wing-extremest Christian. I have different beliefs than him that are more spiritual, but he won't financially support me if I express those or ask for help in those spiritual endeavors. Unless of course they were Christian ones...
I believe that the best way a parent can support a child is by giving them support even if what they are doing contradicts their own beliefs. Because your children won't have the exact same beliefs as you. I think that asking your child to get good grades if your going to be paying is fine. Support them as long as you see them being responsible.
I AM responsible, I get A's in all my classes, but if I want to live w/ my bf of 3 years, I'll get my college funding pulled, because that goes against my dad's Christian beliefs.
I also want to study at this spiritual university, but my dad won't allow me because it was founded by a Buddhist! He tells me that for him personally his children's salvation in Jesus Christ is the most important thing to him, but he won't support me in being me! He tells me %26quot;that's fine, but if you want to do that, it's going to be your own money.%26quot;
I'm responsible, I just want to pursue what makes ME happy in life.
I've come to assume my dad is just going to be like this %26amp; my mom will be as she is. What if I changed my thinking? Asked for what I wanted, even if it's out there, is it possible to manifest a change in these relationships?
If so how? How have you changed your relationships w/ positive manifestation, prayer %26amp; thinking???
PLEASE detailed respectful answers only!
Thank you
Is it possible to manifest more than just material things, such as better current relationships?
Here's a short story that might help you:
A few years ago, during Hurricane Katrina, a man's house started to flood. So he went up to the second floor of his house and started praying to God, %26quot;Lord, please save me!%26quot; A little while later a big truck came by and the driver offered to take man. But he said, %26quot;No thanks, God will save me.%26quot;
The waters continued to rise and the man got up onto the roof and kept praying, %26quot;Lord, please save me!%26quot; After a while, a boat came by and offered to take the man off the roof. But the man said, %26quot;No. God will save me.%26quot;
Finally, after the waters continued to rise, the man got up on the chimney and continued to pray for God to save him. Eventually a helicopter came by and dropped a rope to him but the man refused it, confident in his belief that God would save him.
At the end, he drowned. Then he found himself in heaven, in front of God. He got angry at God and yelled at Him for not coming to save him! God responded, %26quot;What do you mean? I sent you a truck, a row boat, and a helicopter! You're the one who didn't want to save himself!%26quot;
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For me, the point of this story is that we can change our situations and relationships *only by* changing our situations and relationships.
It's not enough to engage in prayer, aspirations or meditations. We've must also take responsible action to create the life we want.
You've placed yourself in a bind. Your parents haven't created this situation - you have made this bind for yourself.
There's nothing to stop you from living with your boyfriend or attending the school of your choice. You have the choice to become independent.
However, you don't really want to be independent because you don't want to give up the financial support provided by your father. So you're a little like the man on the roof, praying to God -- your freedom is right at hand, but you don't want to reach for it.
You're an excellent student. Financial aid is available to excellent students. You're 20 years old. Even in this economy, jobs are available to intelligent twenty year olds. If you truly want independence, then you only need to choose independence.
Of course, any decision we make about our life has consequences. If you become independent, it will bring consequences. On the other hand, if you choose to remain dependent on your father, then simply accept the consequences of that decision.
No life choice is without consequences. Choosing to eat an ice cream cone has consequences on our health. Choosing to live with a partner brings many unforeseen consequences.
But that's how the world works and if you can accept that life simply works in this way, then you will no longer struggle against the flow of human life.
Best wishes on your path!
Is it possible to manifest more than just material things, such as better current relationships?
What you have discovered is that most parents love is conditional. They expect you to support them in their old age. You can manifest a new support system though.
Invisible things cannot be manifested. Just like respect, devotion, love, relationship, etc. cannot be manifested. It pertains to the soul. Every heart only knows that. Prayer to any God or godly is within our control. It is also not visible. One is, therefore, free to pray any God.
The lessons learned with an independent life come so gradually that they sometimes shock us.
Examine your situation without involving yourself personally: you cannot be dependent and independent in equal measure. Choose which way you will pursue and take the next step toward that goal; be prepared to live with the results of your choice.
Ask for God's will for the situation, then it will be best for all.In Buddhism it would be called the Buddha mind. This is just one point of intersection of the religions. There are many more. Find common grond with you father. See your mother as her pure self in her Buddha mind without looking backwards. Forgive yourself and you will be able to forgive everyone eilse.
